dear journal

broken trust
you expect respect?
like a little pool of blood at my feet
i'm not to be touched
don't bother me right now
i don't want to be disturbed
i'm busy being angry at you
why don't you believe me?
i told you at least four times
even after you'd left
this sucks, damn it
i feel like i want to scream
i want to cry
i'm losing something
my mind?
my dignity
the words come faster than the pen can handle
you can't handle it
the pressure of knowing me
of thinking you do anyway
but you don't know me
or you would have believed me
when i told you the first time
damn